Matter of faith
by Sahuaro
Summary: Memories of a past long forgotten. Keys of a door no one ever wants to walk past again. In an age of change and turmoil, where religion and the sword reigned strong, a child like no other was born in the dark. These are the memoirs of a child who grew under the times were might made right. Times in wich surviving were saddly, a matter of faith
1. Prologue

_No… no! Please don't!__  
_

_Always protect her… never let go… and neither of that you so hope for. And once you have it, embrace it, treasure it… give it your all. __  
_

_No… no, please god, no…_

_Heh… you're a good girl… comprehensive and fair… honest… and…_

_**merciful**__…_

_Over there! Don't let him escape!__  
_

_I have faith in that one day you will be able to forgive all of us for the atrocious sins we have committed… them… god… me…_

_Please don't leave… don't leave me alone, please!_

_Farewell, my little girls…_

* * *

Another day were I am unable to conceive a little peace on my sleep. The dim light that manages to filter through the heavily shielded window is as annoying to my eyes as this dream is heavy to my soul. Memories of a past I thought long forgotten come to me on a rush, clustering my mind in order to torment my accursed existence. It was curious how a monster like me had to take her arm to struggle that who many gave by granted my kind didn't had… a heart.

It was curious how a being that could make the hearts of other stop on a whim, so desired its own would do the same in order to extinguish that pain, a pain so nostalgic, so furtive, so accursed. Ever since his arrival the past hasn't stopped harassing me, stalking me at every chance. Ever since his intromission this pain hasn't stopped, not even lessened… since then this poison hasn't stopped killing me.

Even now I still question the past and every single person that took part on it, however I do not reproach it… reproach nothing but one thing… why was I allowed to live? Oh, cruel joke of our god. A free and unoccupied god that's also shameless and deaf. For long years the same plead and always the same indifference.

And yet I myself cling to that fleeting hope. Just as stubborn and shameless, I keep on waiting patiently for those words to come true. I want to have faith… but how am I to keep it if I'm not even able to forgive the faults of those who condemned me to this eternal wait?

Just like those times when I was born, 5 centuries ago, I can't help but feel that my devotion will be put to test once more. I can feel that, just like that time, my holy trail is nigh… my _auto de fé_ lingers close...

I wonder… when was the last time I cried like in this moment?

I can't recall…

* * *

((Author's note: Hello and thank you for picking up this story of mine. This story is a small side-story from my much bigger one called, "The spiriting away of Gensokyo". If you feel interested, I invite you to take a look at it as well. In any case, you dont need any knowledge from that story to enjoy this one, there will be very subtle references here from the other one, but altogheter, this story could easily do as a stand-alone work, so dont worry in that regard.

Well, I don't want to spoil too much with just this prologue, so I'll stop it here. Once again I want to thank you a lot for giving this prologue (and chapter 1 too, maybe?) a chance and I hope you've enjoyed it. Best regards and will come with more chapters soon enough. Thanks.

_Auto de fé_ is spanish for whats known as "act of faith" wich was the trail imposed by the members of the spanish inquisition. It was when people where forced by the church to accept their sins, making their relinquish either their goods, wealth, moral dignity or even their lives... as we all know. I could have changed it... but felt it was better to leave it as was, hehehe.))


	2. I - Sin

I

**Sin  
**

It was strange having to use my own sheets to wash away my tears… tears that I hadn't seen in such a long, long time. It's a shame having to use such delicate cloth for something like this; however I can't allow others to see me like this… I have an image to uphold, a respect to demand and an authority to demonstrate. The days when I was allowed to cry are long left behind.

If so, then why I can't make it stop?

With a couple of soft slaps at my checks I try to reclaim my serenity and elegance once again. It seems to have worked out. I raise my face towards the window and notice the blinding light wasn't as blinding as I first thought. It's dim… very dim.

As I close the distance to the window I discover it's already daylight, however, it's cloudy. Grey clouds reign in the sky from horizon to horizon. I dare say it might even rain.

Immediately thereafter I walk to my dresser where I let my tired arms rest. Thanks to the tears, my burning and red eyes must concur perfectly with the weariness that both my body and mind express. My thirst overwhelms me and at the same time captivating. Maybe a little out-of-time, but a mid-day snack will do me no harm.

Usually my clothes are already disposed for my use, however given the fact that it is unusual for me to be awake at this hour, they aren't. I could call her to make sure she attends my every need, but no… As I well said before, I can't allow others to see this deplorable state and looks of mine.

While I attend my own needs, getting my dress, bonnet and shoes, I can't help but recall that dream. My tears are no longer running wild trough my cheeks; however I can still feel that grief in my heart. The dream, furthered by the grey of the sky, only adds weight to the remembrance. Memories of days old, days I thought I had already left behind. It seems that is not the case and they still live strong in the deepest and most obscure corner of my mind.

The darkness that reigns in my bedroom… the red of my clothes… the grey of the sky… it all converges on a single thought. He told me that the day I was born, much of what I see right now, could be seen then…

* * *

Pestilence and darkness reign wherever one tried to turn their sight. Simply put, there was no corner in the putrid dungeon where one could avert their gaze from the horrors that had been committed and that even now were being done. The laboured yells were quickly silenced by the cold and heavy stones that composed the wide walls of the prison… said yells that begged for a quick and painless death only fell on the deaf eyes of the few accursed that roamed about, counted men and women who practiced a profession no man on his sane judgment would be ever be capable to accept… or even bear.

However, between al the desperation and the pain, a door on the distance could be heard. The rumbling steps of 2 men echoed through the large aisles as hammers into the ears of the few that lived within the almost perpetual dark. Unlike the soulless executioners that wore dark capes and wide hoods, these men that descended boasted rich attires, worthy of a duke, an archbishop or even a king. The dim torches made their jewelry stand out with a somber light, from rings to collars, all in silver, gold and other exotic stones. The bastards within the dungeon couldn't fathom why men of such bearing and power where on the very stomach of hell.

From within the deepest shadows a man appeared. Covered from head to toe, the executioner greeted with a deep bow in reverence to them. It was obvious they were not here by mere mishap or coincidence. One of the lords raised his arm in signal of negation, the other one remained silent as he watched at his surroundings… at all the death and pain.

- It's an honor to have you back, Marquis Fourner, Duke Nighcastle. It is my pleasure to inform that we have made huge leaps in the experiments and tests. I dare say that it's only a matter of time now before we finally get the perfect specimen!

- Then that means you still have not achieved it… am I right?

The hooded man back stepped as he kept a deep, dead silence with him. Despite his hood, it was easy to tell what kind of expression was drawn on his face… one full of fear and worry.

- T-the results… although not what expected, are incredibly encouraging. As I am telling you my lords, it-

- Show us the "results"… - abruptly interrupted the man with a dead serious expression on his face.

Without losing a single second, the mad executioner turned around and began to guide his masters trough the dark and sinister hall, from which only cries and screams could be heard. The men went by without even flinching in the slightest at the devastating sight, as if they already knew about these… as if they knew about that disturbing solitude a little too well.

- I notice you very calm… - One of the men commented, breaking the abysmal silence that had taken place for a couple of moments.

- It is nothing… it's just that it's been a long time since I've last been here… - Answered his partner without paying much attention.

- Today it's the first anniversary, isn't it?

- Yes… - In his face, dimly lit, one could see a trace of pain, melancholy and rage.

- Be at ease. Soon enough we'll have the means to exact revenge on those who need to pay.

Before their talk could go any further, it was violently interrupted by a horrible scream, one full of death and lamentation from one of the prisoners. With her last breath, a chained woman shrieked, trying to convey her pain and hatred to her captors, making them know that their existences would be as painful, hollow and cursed as her own. For 10 long seconds the shriek echoed… it didn't stopped until the woman finally fell silent, and alongside with her head, her life. One of the men turned to see her in her last seconds of life and could see under her a wide pool of blood, blood that came from her inner thigh and extended as a trail all the way to almost two meters in front of her. At the floor lied a strange and deformed being… it seemed to tremor uncontrollably. What seemed to be a twisted arm moved back and forth as a whip, as if it looked for something… maybe a little of mercy… for someone to end its painful life.

- Do not pay attention to those poor souls my lieges. Those are nothing but failures… we are already preparing a new pit to dispose of them.

The hooded man quickly spoke with brutal and cold honesty and cruelty.

- I hope these improvements you talk so much are more than simply "encouraging". You well know how much this place costs us, that without mentioning how important the raw materials are for the production of these… monstrosities.

- Do… do not worry my lord… we are close now… you shall judge the results by yourself.

The men continued walking for a couple of seconds more. With each step they took, another helpless soul expired or watched with tired eyes the men that so indifferently walked in front of them. One couldn't know what was really the cause of deaths of this place… if the inhumane acts that took place or the pestilence in which everyone lived… or maybe…

- Here it is… Duke, Marquis… - The man moved aside and with his arm extended pointed towards a solid rock bed. It was in its majority covered in blood and on each corner a shackle hanged. The marks of fresh blood and skin could still be noticed in them, making them realize these had been used recently.

The men took a step to the front and shoulder to shoulder to spectate whatever their mad worker had prepared for them. The fearful man walked towards the cold wall and lit up a torch, revealing his most recent achievement. As the light vanquished the darkness, the eyes of the two widened in disbelief.

Right in front of them, over the stone bed, was a small girl… a newborn. Her body, unlike every other swine of her own generation was not an aberration to the eye… all the opposite, her white and soft skin shinned with an angelical beauty and charm thanks to the faint light of the torch. Both men turned to see each other and then back at the mad scientist, who most likely was smirking widely under his filthy hood.

The man who answered to the title of marquis bent down and carefully examined the child. It was simply perfect… it was impossible to believe she was… and indeed… she was not.

Soon enough, as the eyes of the two royals grew used to the new light, a detail made itself relevant. Behind the newborn, at her back, two strange appendages could be seen.

- What's that? – The marquis asked as he turned towards the hooded man. The other man, the duke, remained silent, still observing with prudence and care at the child.

- Wings my lord… wings…

The duke moved himself closer to the baby and took her on his arms, raising her and showing the said wings to his friend. It was like a horrible burn scar that blackened and overshadowed the skin and the beauty of one. In a single instant, the smile of the marquis vanished and alongside it, the smirk of his employee.

- Get rid of them – The marquis was quick to demand a fix

- We have tried my lord… they grow almost as soon as we cut them off.

- This can't be…

- This girl is almost the paragon of your designs my lord… a pure vampire.

- You said it yourself… Almost!... With those wings sprouting out of her back… and a woman nevertheless! – The marquis tries to keep his cool as he takes his hand to his forehead. – What about the mother?... Surely it's possible for her to give us another remarkable specimen such as this one!

- Not possible, sir… the woman died after giving birth to this creature…

The bad news didn't cease to hit the marquis hopes who could only see his inversion, his hopes and wishes escape from him with every word.

- For god's sake!... These are not good news, these are only false hopes! – The marquis howled in despair and anger as he hit the rock bed with great force.

- Do not lose faith my lord! We have now a much more clear idea on the dosage we need to use as well as the important aspects we need to watch out for in order to create a specimen such as refined as this and more. That's why I tell you…it is only a matter of time for us to create the perfect specimen… the weapon you both have invested so much on.

The words of the executioner quickly appeased the marquis who seemed to be losing his sanity any moment now. While letting a deep and long sigh escape from him, he turned towards the path that took them there in the first place.

- Very well… in that case you have more time.

- Th-thanks a lot, my lieges!

The marquis turned towards his friend who was still contemplating the infant, almost utterly lost in his own thoughts.

- **Horace**, leave that monster there. Let him get rid of it. A magnificent specimen indeed… yet in the grand scheme of things, still a failure.

- Monster? – Finally breaking his own silence, the duke spoke a single word. That small girl that was still on his arms could only return the gaze, a gaze filled with infinite curiosity and innocence. Her little hands fluttered back and forth, as if they searched to grasp the wind within her frail fingers. However it wasn't the wind what she caught… it was a beard, wide and thick, of a red scarlet as deep as blood itself. The duke found himself surprised by this as so where those around him. Everyone could only watch that little girl take those bulky hairs and play with them between her fingers. Suddenly then, the man raised her softly until she was at the same height as his face, but all without forcing her to let go of her childish grasp. The man watched the girl directly to her eyes and she did the same as well… and then, without previous advice, smiled at him.

- Ah!.. Excuse my lethargy my duke… I'll take care of her right now.

The hooded man rushed in order to take the girl and throw her away, but before he could lay his rotten hands on her, the duke moved the girl away. Both the demented scientist and her master, the marquis, found themselves dumb folded by the action.

- No… you're not a monster… - the duke whispered to the wind as he eyed once again the girl.

- Horace… you're not going to do what I am thinking... the order will never accept this and you know it.

- **Alain**, leave the order to me. I've done way too much for them; they'll have no means to oppose.

-This has no precedent, and this thi… this girl… she's not human. Under what excuse will you keep her under your wing?

- I'll find the way… you know it.

The marquis sighed deeply as the executioner turned his head from left to right trying to understand what was going on between his masters.

- Fine… but remember that I cannot help you with this in case the order disapproves it. From a friend to another, my suggestion is that you get rid and forget about that… thing.

Having said that, the marquis turned towards his servant and with a single hand motion made him understand that he had enough of that place already. Without adding a single word more, he resumed his march out of the aisle directed to the same stairs that led to such a small hell on earth. Stairs which from time to time, a faint light sneaked by to induce hollow hopes on those who lived condemned there.

As the marquis figure disappeared within the darkness of the dungeon, the deafening shriek of a thunder echoed trough not only the cursed prison, but also the whole castle.

- Duke Nightcastle… a storm is headed this way. This place was designed in such a way that all the water gets gathered here and floods the aisle and cells. This way we can clean quickly and efficiently… heheh… although I must admit it is not a pretty sight to behold, much less to be present when said flood takes place. So please, if you may, it is time to go back.

The duke once again said nothing. His total attention was centered around the beautiful child that still played on his arms. In his face a small and faint smile got drawn… a smile he thought he would never be able to recover in what is left of his life. However, at the very moment this smile grew larger on his expression, his eyes were being filled with melancholy and sadness… a strange and calm guilt he well knew he would never be able to atone.

Raising the girl high over his head, he watched her with a heart full of mixed feelings, and then, with a very soft yet deep voice said a couple of words that would mark not only his own life and the lives of many in the close future, but also the lives of those in the very, very distant future…

- Your name, my little one, shall be… **Remilia**…

* * *

((**AN:** well fellas, there you have it... the first chapter of this little yet special story of mine. I hope you like it and once again I apologize for my english...

For those interested, a friend of mine did some drawings of various scenes from these chapters. I'll leave them here for your appreciation. Thanks again to you guys for reading and sparing me some of your time and attention and thanks to my friend for the awesome drawings! Just add mediafire´s main domain (the triple w, mediafire and the dot com) at the beggining of the string to access the image.

/view/a5bc1xhw4a8rvaj/baby%20Remi%

/view/mdzztynaay2lkvb/Remi%20baby%20and%

and one more... she will probably scold me for uploading this one, but I'll apologize later XD. I do want to share these with you guys.

/view/efq8gnzfzh9rdvz/Remi%20peque%2C%20Remi%

/view/3vnsjpokpu2h2vx/Remi%

And thats it. Hope you like them as much as I do, lol. I'll be bringing chapter two as soon as I can. Just like my other story, this one is already done up to the next chapter, so I need to translate everything first. Thanks and see ya around!))


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